These are the main reasons I left Gyan. If you’re a BK read the list at your own risk. One of the 10 might be what sets you free.
The top 10 reasons why I left the BKs
LoL! No one is Karmateet yet. Everyone is still an effort maker. I need to check myself. Her problem is really my own problem! LMAO! The Shrimat where Baba will be responsible if a senior tells you to do something and you do it will only go so far. Especially, when every Sari wearing circus animal is a Senior compared to you.
- 9: Discrepancies in Gyan.
If Gyan is really given by the all knowing, all everything, blah blah then why doesn’t Gyan just come complete? Because if it was it would not be accepted by the children? Because of drama? Hmpt! Also, why doesn't the Ocean of Knowledge seem to know anything about quantum physics? Curious.
In the last few months of my BK life I had learned how to analyze my dreams. From my dreams, I could see my subconscious perception of the family and BKWSU, not pretty. I also saw I was loosing faith.
My personal opinion about Gyan's view towards other religions was it did not seem to view other religions in a benevolent manner. It just did not quite sit right in my intellect why even Jesus Christ was not appreciated more. If we are the highest on high angels of the one true religion, then shouldn't we be more compassionate and benevolent to the wannabes?
When I went into remembrance, I sought to have Yoga with the highest supreme God. That was where I directed my mind to go. This Yoga seemed to be leading me away from the BKWSU. In the last part of my BK life I did not even like to direct my mind to Shiv Baba, I wanted to make sure I was having Yoga with the intended party (the highest God) just in case the BKWSU 'might' have got the whole God thing wrong.
I was about to be given increased responsibility. Moving to another less developed country where Lokiks were easy pickings for a Master Ocean of Knowledge like me. My perception of the karmic repercussions of teaching truck loads of others to give up the world and surrender to the BKWSU and Didi Nirmila made me feel, to say the least, uneasy. The final days I was churning out poison from the Gyan instead of butter so, finally, faith in my own interpretations won.
I was researching many different forms of spiritualities, some of which involved spiritual and energy healing such as Reiki. I did my research behind closed doors for the most part. The opinion I got from the family for energy healing was a big no-no. I was told by a good friend-brother from the UK that Janti said anyone can develop these healing abilities but that it wasn't good for Gyani souls to do it. This seemed absolutely absurd considering what kind of service 'energy healing' combined with Raja Yoga could do. So I did my research and experimentation mainly in private. When I left Gyan, it felt I was evolving in some way.
When I first got into Gyan, I loved Morning Class. I loved Amirt Vela. I loved it all. But as my lens of perception changed from, "I have finally come home to Angels and I am one of them" to, "what a bunch of monkeys", everything became a burden, especially listening to some half wit give her drooling interpretation of Murli every morning.
During my last few months with the BKWSU the first few thoughts of the each morning was pretty much guaranteed to be, "Oh God! Not another day of this, argh, my back, oh, its 3:55. Oh God ..."
- 2: Freezing cold baths in India.
Why are there no showers in India? Why, why, why? Is there some kind of law about having to use plastic buckets to bath? Or is this just some ego trip by the Seniors to put all the ordinary BKs in their place.
No really, I was having really disturbing dreams where I, acting like a dog with rabies, would pounce on anything that had 2 legs and try to reach orgasm before I woke. Sometimes I would wake up with a climax and other times, wake up really frustrated to be on the verge of a climax and Divine Intellect taking over the half unconscious mind, "Stop!". This started to happen in my last few months of Gyan, I think it even happened during my last visit to Maduban. I felt so bad about that, but sex just feels SOOOoooo good.
"This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes." - Morpheus