Tara ... a baby ex-BK

User avatar
tara
ex-BK
Posts: 6
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Location: London

Tara ... a baby ex-BK

Post by tara » 31 Dec 2007

Hi!

Sorry for my English, it is because I am originally Italian. I am one of those that the BK Family world calls, "THE LAST THE FAST". Dadi give me the name of TARA.

As it has been only one year and half since I join the BKs, but I feel that something is missing. I think that, what made me strong is the faith and trust that I have in GOD.

If I am so fast ... and what ever, why I feel guilty and I have fear in GOD, why I feel like that my senior is try to controlling me? Why do I feel cutting out from the world? I don't have doubt about GOD, it is about the Family.

I met so many fantastic people in London and in India as a first timer in October, still if there eyes/face are smiling the body language tell me different?
  • Am I thinking too much?
    Am I having waisting thoughts?
    What is going on ... ?
Om Shanti

User avatar
fluffy bunny
ex-BKWSU
Posts: 5365
Joined: 07 Apr 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: ex-BK. Interested in historical revisionism, failed predictions and abuse within the BK movement.

Post by fluffy bunny » 31 Dec 2007

tara wrote:Am I thinking toooo much?
Am I having waisting thought?
What is going on ... ?
Hi Tara,

... welcome aboard the 'Pirate Ship of Freethinking BK' types.

Its the holiday season and so replies might be only a few at this time as folks go back home and deal with family matters.

What is going on? Well, if I dare suggest, the Intoxication of the Honeymoon Period is or has worn off and you are starting to see how things really are. No longer the baby of the family, the baby talk does not have the same effect any more and you are starting to, rightfully, want more or to go further. The mothers gave you their love in the 'days of your childhood'. Now you have grown up.

I am sorry to say that probably all of us on this forum have been given lots of attention and encouragement and told that "the last go fast" to make up for missing out on the early period. Perhaps they have even suggested that you were a BK in your last birth? Its usual.

Is it the End of the World? No, it is just the start. And now you start to make yourself. congratulations for having the courage and independence to come onto this forum and start to face a bigger part of the truth.

Keep thinking, even keeping a diary is still a good things at this point, dig deep and start asking questions. Many BKs or BK types use this forum as a sort of online diary. You will discover more about the BKWSU, or at least the leadership of the BKWSU, by their response to informed questioning that you have learned in morning class to date.

Those were the ingredients on the back of the packet, the advertising ... from here on in, it is the actual contents of the box you are dealing with. There is plenty of room inside or outside of the box for you to make yourself, and remake the BKWSU ... if you so chose. No, you are not alone in having reached the point you have.

My suggestion is you start by reading over the BKWSU History section of the forum and asking why the version the BKWSU teaches does not match reality, why they hid and covered up the real story of the Yagya and other actors, why they keep hidden and re-write the Murlis. You will see original documents from the 30s and 40s the BKWSU kept hidden and told no one about.

Believe in your intuitions if you feel you are being used or abused. Keep talking and tell us how things are. May be you can start a topic in the Newcomers forum to introduce yourself.

User avatar
tara
ex-BK
Posts: 6
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Location: London

Post by tara » 31 Dec 2007

Good morning? I am alive. I am a baby ex-BK, proud to be here. Happy to be here. The BK would say Lara is dead is not coming anymore. Hahahhahahahaha, I feel alive now after leaving BK. Actually, thank you BK for making me strong.

Everything is going so fast for me that I realise the virtue to be humble. I start very fast in BK, now even faster that I stopped going to the BK. With no intention to go back. The Family itself help me to realise that was something wrong, but I thought was me not making double-afford.

I was the one who destroyed years of Murli in the centre. I was the one doing ironing (jobless for a year and half) for BK and non-BK family which are living in the centre, where is purity?
  • THERE ARE SO MANY SOUL THAT THEY HAVE BEEN IN THE BK FOR SO MANY YEARS, HOW TO HELP THEM?
    HOW TO HELP A LITTLE GIRL (3 years) which she is growing in the centre?
    How to help the depressed mother non-BK who is controlled by the mother-in-law BK senior? You can imagine.
    How to help people that have their marriage destroyed?
    How to help people with no friends because of detachment?
    How to help Brothers and Sisters which are in the knowledge for 15-20-30 years thinking that they help souls?
    Is not a Drama? Cannot be so bad?
I love God more then anything else, I like to continue my spiritual grow. Any religion or congregation I've met are taking advantage of GOD. WHY?

They start to present the people in front of GOD and it's end up to present GOD in front of the people. WHY?

After Christianity I start to go to KI HEALTH for six month, where, I wonder why they never contact me to pay the £5.000 pound I own them for some weird ceremony and now BK were it was free I thought was a genuine congregation. (I sold my house willing to open a centre but I still have the money) I let BK to take nearly everything.

What is next? I now I am not alone but ??? What about Osho is just like them?

I send you all my love wishing you all the happiness is in the universe for the next 5000 years !!!

User avatar
sparkal
BK supporter
Posts: 462
Joined: 04 May 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: BK supporter
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: BK supporter
Location: Shivalaya

welcome

Post by sparkal » 31 Dec 2007

Hello and welcome.

Spirituality has nothing to do with material things. That includes money.

Your eyes are more open than they were, but you cannot afford to relax too much as something else may come in another guise, pretending to be spiritual and giving, yet, as you say, the nature can be to take.

This is unacceptable and we must feed back to these individuals or they may never change or see what they are doing.

Love and peace.

User avatar
joel
ex-BK
Posts: 440
Joined: 01 May 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: I was an active BK for 12 years. That was long ago. Now I am just a person.

Post by joel » 01 Jan 2008

Hi Tara,

Welcome to the forum. It is good to hear you speaking your own words as an independent person. I wish you all the best in the new year, and in your new life.

User avatar
tara
ex-BK
Posts: 6
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Location: London

Post by tara » 01 Jan 2008

Good afternoon!!!

If Spirituality has nothing to do with material things I agree with you,
but I met people in the BK where they give a lot of money to the centre and after they were disappointed. I know material things are no important in life in spiritual life but they still play a part in the drama.

You say, "This is unacceptable and we must feed back to these individuals or they may never change or see what they are doing". The main reason that I left BK is because they were telling me how to dress, how to speak, how to ... and what ever.

We cannot go there and tell them how to live there life,because that way we become like them.
The centre call me, they want to talk to me.

I am on my way there now, I believe that they will try to change my opinion, but you see, I know I cannot go there and be free to say what I fell because I know the way they think and they will judge me instead to listen to me.

I have to be strong, have faith in me and God "Shiv Baba". Good wishes and a lot of love will be the key.

And to you all too.

User avatar
freedom
ex-BK
Posts: 136
Joined: 02 May 2006

Post by freedom » 01 Jan 2008

Dear Tara,

Happy New Year !!!

I wish that you step beyond this BK "past life" and live your beautiful truth life asap but until then, my opinion and experience is that; YES, you are free to say whatever you want, and DO NOT care of what they think, judge of you. We are all free human beings to choose our paths and change to any direction we want to.

Regarding the money, YES, money has to do with spirituality because money is good energy. We need money. We need good food, comfortable clothes and a nice, safe, clean place to live. God, the Universe, Shiv Baba, or any name you have in your heart to believe is supporting you for your good choices, DOES NOT WANT YOU to live like a beggar because we are worthy of all that is good on this planet ... REGARDLESS of the future, Golden Age, Age of Aquarius, Heaven on Earth.

My experience with BKs was it is just good to believe that there is a Source of Energy that we are entitled to connect at anytime we want. But the downside was much bigger. They did not teach how to love myself, other people, the planet, nature. They did not give me freedom of speech and with that came a consciousness of being lost and part of a group that only see money and love as EVIL but they themselves can enjoy that now ...

So, dear Tara, put all the negativity behind and start fresh, take the good times and create your present as big and wonderful as YOU WANT!!!

Lots of JOY, HEALTH, HARMONY and money to you in 2008 !!!!

Freedom

User avatar
tara
ex-BK
Posts: 6
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Location: London

Post by tara » 01 Jan 2008

Hi there!

I just came out from the centre where I told the senior that I don't go anymore. I was flying on my way home. I was free. I was double light.

I suffered from depression when I was going to the centre but now I have a homeopath friend that helps me a lot. Thanks Sean. I want to live in the Golden Age now, "power of now", because it is only now that we are sure about.

Still doing meditation but not Raja Yoga.

User avatar
alladin
Friends and family of
Posts: 718
Joined: 27 Feb 2007

a bunch of plastic flowers

Post by alladin » 02 Jan 2008

The main reason that I left BK is because they were telling me how to dress, how to speak, how to ... and what ever.
Can this be a good enough reason? Yes! Dresses, exercising, codes and appearances may seem to belong to the realm of superficiality but as Tara you quickly realized, and by reading in the appropriate topics on the Forum archives, you will realize more that all of these things are very significant because they connect with the intent the organization has of controlling people's lives. This is why independent minded souls, have a hard time surviving in it and the BKWSO considers them to be "trouble makers". So, good start of the new year for you. If possible, do not sulk totally with Baba, like Freedom suggested, connect with a Higher Source of energy. If possible, overcome the feeling of distaste and disillusionment with the BKWSO and try not to associate God with it or make your connection with the Supreme dependent on them.

Every now and then, I hear BKs say that, "things are not as strict as they used to be". In fact, even these days, pukka, loyal and reliable BKs are the ones that go around in sarees and kurtas and sandals; slightly tight-fitting or coloured clothes are considered as reproachable. Your post confirms that they still put a lot of pressure on people and try to crush their personality. They do not just let people blend in and express themselves and contribute to a healthy growth of the organization. Baba talks about the beauty, speciality and scent that each flower has to offer, but the organization is into turning every member into plastic lifeless machine-made flowers. :roll: We don't want to become that!! We have the right to prosper, and look for the right soil, sun and friends that can help us grow in the light of truth!

And may I add that it is really saddening to notice that supposed to be "meditation teachers", put so much energy on making students feel inappropriate about their looks etc ... trying to mold them externally to fit them into a stereotype, rather than concentrating on sharing something deep and spiritual. Where are some quality and wise teachers? Baba says time is short, so why do they waste it on such trivial things? Our stage and progress are constantly challenged by old patterns and external influences. We need to share and support each others in a subtle way, to empower and awaken each other!

When we sign in for meditation, most of us have internal transformation and improvement in mind. If our need was about changing looks, we would all gone to hairdressers and boutiques, not to a Raja Yoga so-called center. Shame on those who divert students' attention on useless aspects! It tells you where they are at; not in an "unlimited" consciousness!!

To be honest, I have grown a bit skeptical about the positive support of sole Raja Yoga meditation and anything similar in people's personalities changes. Psychologists & co, may seem less mystic and charming, but I am sure that, although imperfect they are professionals and have studied the human psyche in depth for years, no improvisation, no fast obtained "license to kill".

User avatar
fluffy bunny
ex-BKWSU
Posts: 5365
Joined: 07 Apr 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: ex-BK. Interested in historical revisionism, failed predictions and abuse within the BK movement.

Exit strategy

Post by fluffy bunny » 02 Jan 2008

Go for it Tara ... run free ... breath deeply ... join life again and live. Learn your own lessons and refuse the burden of the Brahma-kumaris.

What did the sister say to you? How did she look or behave? What was the party line?

Do you have an Indian sister or a Western one?

User avatar
bansy
Posts: 1643
Joined: 30 Apr 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK

Post by bansy » 02 Jan 2008

Welcome to the forum tara.

I hope you take away the good things you had with the BKs and not let other factors block your way.

Spread love and peace to the world the best way you can.

User avatar
arjun
PBK
Posts: 11513
Joined: 01 May 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: PBK
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: to exchange views with past and present members of BKWSU and its splinter groups
Location: India

Post by arjun » 02 Jan 2008

tara wrote:I have to be strong, have faith in me and God "Shiv Baba". Good wishes and a lot of love will be the key.
Sister tara,

Welcome to the forum. It is nice to know that despite the difficulties you faced as a BK, you still have faith in God. Even without naming God as ShivBaba you can continue your spiritual journey.

With best wishes,
On Godly service,
Arjun

User avatar
fluffy bunny
ex-BKWSU
Posts: 5365
Joined: 07 Apr 2006
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: ex-BK. Interested in historical revisionism, failed predictions and abuse within the BK movement.

Post by fluffy bunny » 02 Jan 2008

You can also just go and live a good ordinary life without carry anyone else's burden and deal with necessities. I'd say take a break from any organized religion and just appreciate others, life and rejoin humanity.

Personally, I am not happy with the confusion between "Shiva Baba" and God that the BKWSU makes. There is no evidence to suggest that the two are the same yet ... or perhaps ever.

You can even just be "good" without either of them. Keep things simple. The danger is that the BKWSU's practises have open up various channels within you and they impregnated your mind with lots of BKWSU conditioning.
  • These might take some time to get rid of but we are here to talk you through if needed.

User avatar
tara
ex-BK
Posts: 6
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK
Location: London

Post by tara » 03 Jan 2008

Hi!

Sorry I've take long to replay! I just enjoy my sleep now. Hahahah ... kidding! Or my freedom.

When I went to the centre on Tuesday, we sat in Baba's room (me and the Indian senior alone). Usually when we have a chat, we used to sit next door in the class. I guess she needs help.

I don't know if you believe me or not, but I was feeling so strong that I was even surprise of my stage and the power was coming from God, that when I looked Brahma Baba for me was only a picture.

The Sister said that if I was going to leave the BK, I was going to have a depression,
and that if I was still coming in the early morning, Baba was going to help me to make a decision. She said that they need my help because Dadi is coming with in 15 days and was a lot of work to do. She seems so small (does it sound arrogant? sorry!!).

After about 20 minutes, the little girl (her grandchild) open the door, you should have seen her face when she saw me. I just wished I could take her away from that hell. Sorry that maybe too much, we were quite attached (sorry, it shouldn't be in the BK).

One day (about 2 month ago) the grandma said that I wasn't allowed to speak or to play with the child. She made me laugh and after when she was apologise she make up a story. I was looking after the Senior Sister in India, that meant 24 of 24 hours, and she used to made up so many lies and story that I couldn't believe it. She met Brahma Baba, so how long she is in the Knowledge? Ups!!! 40 years ... Sorry!!!

The child jumped on my knee and said, "hallo my sister" and she give me a strong hug. The mother came in (she looked very sick*) and as a joke she said, "hello sister". I replied.
  • The child, "She IS my sister (referring to me)."
    I: "We are all sisters! Together!"
    Child: "No, she is my sister."
    Mother: "My friend."
    Child: "No she is my friend. She is my sister."
    Grandma: "Stop it, naughty girl." (she often call the child with names)
The child went down from my knee and pushed the grandma and said go away. And then she come back to me with a anger face.
  • I: "Where is the little angel?"
    She smiled.
    I: "Angel are nice with Da" (name given to the grandma).
    Child: "She is no Da she is bad man".
I believe children have a sixth sense for the first 4-6 years old. I hope she stay strong. So many times the child did not give respect to the grandma. Only to the grandma.

I don't know what is true and what is false in the knowledge. I don't know which one to believe! I agree about detached but where is Love in all this because I did not see/felt any? I believe all the souls are the same, no Jesus (in Christianity), no Brahma Baba (in BK) and what ever ... are better then other souls ...?

* THE MOTHER had a arranged marriage 5 years ago. She said that she used to cry a lot at the beginning, first 2 years, and then slowly she become strong. I did not see any human right do not even talk about spirituality.

No bad or good, just be and be with love.

bkti-pit
BK
Posts: 274
Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Affinity to the BKWSU: ex-BK

Post by bkti-pit » 20 Jan 2008

Hi Tara! Welcome to the forum. Here is a place where you can share openly.

There are a lot of good people like you who come to the BKs and are used and abused. This is not right, this is not spirituality, this is not what Baba is teaching them.

How to help? I am still a BK, living in a Center, and there are many of us here who do our best to change what is obviously wrong and to help when we are aware of situations of abuse but some are so, should I say "brainwashed", or have their self-respect so damaged that they do not even accept help. It is like they feel they are doing something good by letting themselves being abused.
  • I am glad that you had enough common sense to trust your feelings and save yourself.
    Enjoy your freedom and your love for God.
    May you have a long and healthy spiritual life.
With lots of love and respect,

BK Ti-Pit

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests