How can I help a surrendered sister?

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john
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Post by john » 27 Nov 2006

ex-l wrote:In defence of the newcomers, I like to say that there are individual's interests, the organizations interest but also societies interest. And if we accept the possibility that the BKWSU's interest and "God's" interest might not be entirely parallel, society - which means other third parties - has a right and responsibility to keep an eye out for what is going on here.

Absolutely.
To follow Shrimat 100% as directed in the Murlis is a very strict path. One which society at large may see as peculiar or unnecessary. On top of that it may be that the BKWSU are misinterpreting those ideas and leading souls in the wrong direction in some or all of the directives. I am still baffling out for myself what is Shrimat and what is BKmat. In my opinion there is a pearl within the oysterworld of BKness and that is Murli. Newcomers would not be aware of this and I am certainly not asking them to agree with me, but part of my responsibilty is to point it out if asked.

So to newcomers I say there may be something in the BKWSU that BKs need. I am NOT saying all is well or right within the BKWSU, but as to what percentage of BKs are happy in there path or troubled I do not know.

For now they rule the 'roost' as far as the Yagya is concerned, many of the mistakes they have made/are making are now being documented and awareness is being raised on these issues.

Time, I am sure will tell as to how much truth they spoke ...

babies
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Post by babies » 28 Nov 2006

We have spoken on many things the last few days and i feel no better! There could be an issue of madness in there and on the other hand BK issues that I just don't understand!

It is so hard to see what is her and what is not. There is a lot of talk about Karma from a previous life and Dadi saying some people have an omen over them I am not sure if she means her or me or what I should be taking from that, it was just said.

It is clear that she is moving away from me and said she was here to see the Grandchildren not me which, feeling hurt, I challenged. But any talk of happy times are either me misreading what 'really' happened or she just blanks and appears to not remember. I am losing hope and her I feel.

There is also an ongoing health issue which she is just not dealing with and I cannot seem to get through to her that she must seek help she keeps turning it back on herself as a previous life and Karma issue.

Then again is it in her mind? Are there mind games going on? Is she just so exhausted that she is feeling things that aren't there? How do I help on these levels how do I see through? Are some of these things normal within the BKs, should I worry?

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bansy
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Post by bansy » 28 Nov 2006

Ask your mum one simple direct question : Do you trust me or do you trust them? No in-between answer.

Ask another question : If Dadi and you fell down a whirlpool, whose hand would you stretch out for, mum?

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john
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Post by john » 28 Nov 2006

There is also an ongoing health issue which she is just not dealing with and I cannot seem to get through to her that she must seek help she keeps turning it back on herself as a previous life and Karma issue.
This is very weird, even Dadis and Didis get medical help. Just because someone has Karma doesn't mean you sit back and do nothing about it.

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mr green
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Post by mr green » 28 Nov 2006

John wrote:This is very weird, even Dadis and Didis get medical help. Just because someone has Karma doesn't mean you sit back and do nothing about it.
I have seen many such cases, especially involving mental illness, many BKs blame their stage for illness, it even says in Murlis that illnesses are from waste thoughts

babies
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Post by babies » 26 Jan 2007

It is a long time since I last posted but I still read up every week or so to see if there is anyone else going through this!

Nothing has changed and deeper and deeper she goes but I know I can say or do nothing until she has her own doubts and opens up to me.

I couldn't bring myself to ask the Trust question as I know the answer would not be what I hoped it would and would drive her further away by saying it.

We talked about the children and she assured me nothing had been said and that really they were 'old souls' and it was all in there already!

To me the relationship seems easier since I have aired the children issue but it is also very quiet. It is not her anymore, if you know what I mean. She feels so empty we just have nothing to talk about but to me that is easier than listening to the usual stuff.

I will post back now and again!

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bansy
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Post by bansy » 26 Jan 2007

Hi Babies,

Maybe all our cases are different and everyone goes through it differently, but its good to share too. Hang on in there. Does she know this forum ? Don't tell her directly, scribble it down on a piece of paper and put it in an obvious place.

Bansy

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fluffy bunny
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Please give a short description of your interest in joining this forum.: ex-BK. Interested in historical revisionism, failed predictions and abuse within the BK movement.

Post by fluffy bunny » 26 Jan 2007

babies wrote:We talked about the children and she assured me nothing had been said and that really they were 'old souls' and it was all in there already!
Yes, that is standard BKWSU projection. None of them really know such things, they just hope and wish that it is true to justify to themselves they are doing the right thing. Speculating just who is, or will become, a BK is their way of spicing up their lives and keep up enthusiasm for service. There is obviously no way any kids would come out with stuff like that of their own.

"Old soul" means that the child had reincarnated many times before ... they believe that 84 is the most and that is for them only. Buddhists and Christians only have half as many years on Earth ... or much less.

It means that she thinks they are "Brahmin souls", e.g. BKs, and the rational for this is that for them to have been born near her there must have been some prior karma. She probably speculates that they "must have been BKs in their past life" ... and any sign such as a love of curry, or other Indian-ness, evidence of "wisdom" will only encourage this.

The other area that you might watch is over issues of "purity" when it comes to washing, touching and sexuality as they grow older.

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proy
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Post by proy » 29 Jan 2007

babies wrote:It is a long time since I last posted but I still read up every week or so to see if there is anyone else going through this!
Oh, there are many people going through this, believe me. If it is any help then I would give you this general advice. Is she a "Feeling Person" or a "Thinking Person"? Which is she at the time you are with her? Take a little stand back from the situation and see.

If she is in feeling mode, then reply to her in feeling mode. It will be no good trying to get her intellectual doubts going at that time. Conversely, if she is in thinking mode then is the time to talk about facts.

This is basic psychology I know, but when one is in a difficult situation it takes some self-discipline to remember it. It may sound manipulative but actually all you are doing is responding to the person at the same level they are at at the time. They call it "Pacing" in Neuro-Linguistic Programming. The idea, at its best, is for the good of all parties and for the best communication. At its worst the technique is used to sell people things that they don't want or need. Could be a new car or a dodgy religious cult!
babies wrote:I will post back now and again!
Yes, please do. Remember we are human too, we have many of us been through what you are going through , and we feel for you in your situation. Also don't forget you can send people on this forum Private Messages. It does not have to be public. Feel free to send me a Private message anytime you need support. I know how you feel, not so much because I feel it myself, but because I put my own wife through all this when I was a BK. Now it is some of my friends that are in the same boat. Support is here.

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abrahma kumar
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I get in or pull him out might be of interest

Post by abrahma kumar » 31 Jan 2007

Hi babies if you ever pop by the site again this topic might be of interest: I get in or pull him out.

Regards

AbrahmaKumar

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