What's pulling me away

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abrahma kumar
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Post by abrahma kumar » 06 Apr 2007

allladin, Ex-I thanks. the in/out mismatch i know from personal experience - not so much financially but in the sense that those in certain positions have their favourites and typically those favorites are 'less experienced' souls glad to be given opprtunity to feel that they are not just ordinary students. The loftier the chance given the tighter the bondage is between the 2 of them and heaven help you if you upset the less experienced soul.

But you know what they ought to realise - and maybe all us souls can remind ourselves of this when the going gets tough - we all have our birthright. No one can take from you what belongs to you. It is a contravention of Karma.

And thats another reason that I am getting pulled away. I am beginning to see practically that my Godly birthright is securely in the hands of God for me His child to go and uplift in service of the world whenever the time is ripe. It belongs to me! It is in Baba's keeping for me. BKWSU or no BKWSU I will retain my relationship with the Supreme Soul.

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What's pulling me away?

Post by abrahma kumar » 08 Apr 2007

The all pervading spirit of prohibition that abounds in the BKWSU is what is helping to pull me away. The more my individual, unique spiritual development takes shape these strictures seem utterly counterproductuve to the development of a banlanced personality. Some souls, I have no doubt, thrive in this atmosphere (hooray for them), but for me, "No can go for that any more". Combined with this is the persoanlity clashes with those who are the self-appointed upholders of these strictures. To many "do nots"!

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Re: What's pulling me away?

Post by joel » 08 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:The all pervading spirit of prohibition that abounds in the BKWSU is what is helping to pull me away. The more my individual, unique spiritual development takes shape these strictures seem utterly counterproductuve to the development of a balanced personality.
It does take time. I would be interested in hearing what you have to say about the rules you follow and those you don't, never have, or have left behind as you pursue your own development. Do you feel the same way about the disciplines as you have earlier in your life as BK?

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Re: What's pulling me away?

Post by abrahma kumar » 08 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:The all pervading spirit of prohibition that abounds in the BKWSU is what is helping to pull me away. The more my individual, unique spiritual development takes shape these strictures seem utterly counterproductuve to the development of a banlanced personality.
joel wrote:It does take time. I would be interested in hearing what you have to say about the rules you follow and those you don't, never have, or have left behind as you pursue your own development. Do you feel the same way about the disciplines as you have earlier in your life as BK?
Hi Joel, Am getting around to that telling of the rules i follow/never have/left behind; and no, I do not feel the same way about the disciplines as i did earlier in my BK life.

Previously I have wondered whether there is a 'personal' benefit accrued by/to the Shiva Soul - if such a being as presented by the BKWSU exists - as a result of us devotees being celibate, teetotal, vegetarian, egoless, viceless, movieless, bookless, brothers of sisters, sisters of brothers, blah, blah? I continue to wonder. In composing this post another set of thoughts crossed my mind based on some of the more painful experiences shared by posters on this site.

Does the Shiva soul - or some other spiritual entity - benefit from the 'suffering' of souls as they struggle on the path of spiritual study as promulgated by the BKWSU - there have been so many painful stories related on the forum recently. While the BKWSU does not have a Counselling Department or a Mental Health Assessment Department. Neither does it appear to extend an "Open Day" invitation to Health Care professionals so that they may visit centres to speak to students on issues related to mental/emotional health and the identification and treatment of personality 'anomalies'. And wouldn't the relatives of BKWSU students also benefit from such talks? Jannisder, Di, Kate ...

Could it be argued that ALL of the BKWSU service is outward looking, geared at expanding the sphere of influence of its particular brand of spirituality? One consequence of this being that the holistic well-being of its students is unfortunately off-radar.

Is the unalloyed combination of Raja Yoga Meditation/Murli study/Daily Timetable/ Maryadas/ Special food rituals blah blah really the answer to ALL of life's eventualities and needs?

And yes I know that this latter question strikes at the heart of one of the much vaunted myths that we Godly students are told: The perfect life is a Yogi Life (BKWSU yogi-life that is)

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sado masochism

Post by alladin » 08 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:The all pervading spirit of prohibition that abounds in the BKWSU is what is helping to pull me away. The more my individual, unique spiritual development takes shape these strictures seem utterly counterproductuve to the development of a banlanced personality. Some souls, I have no doubt, thrive in this atmosphere (hooray for them), but for me,
Neither does it appear to extend an "Open Day" invitation to Health Care professionals so that they may visit centres to speak to students on issues related to mental/emotional health and the identification and treatment of personality 'anomalies'.

Interesting mail, I will read it again and comment more on the topic of prohibitions, for sure. For now, it seems to me that, although the idea of the "Open Day" is fantastic, I suppose you are teasing, because:

A: BKs think Raja Yoga is the highest, the only panacea to all sufferings and problems. From such an arrogant stand, why should they invite professionals to say something? VIPs are only useful as big mics, not when they might say something different or against, and as I said in some other post, most psychologists and psychiatrists notice that the BK orgamization and members are unmistakeably and highly disfunctional.

B: By know we know that what's all about is using and brainwashing people, not bringing benefit ( overall, I am not saying that all BK teachers do not mean good!). Why should they let BKs participate in some healthful activity/ discussion, through which some lock on intellects may break open, plus they'd become subject to criticism by PROFESSIONALS, not by simpletons like us low ranks!!!

Lawful, power freaks disfunctional personalities, are sadists as well, so, why should they throw the axe on their's own feet and loose their maso victims?

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Re: What's pulling me away?

Post by joel » 08 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:Is the unalloyed combination of Raja Yoga Meditation/Murli study/Daily Timetable/ Maryadas/ Special food rituals blah blah really the answer to ALL of life's eventualities and needs?
BK spokespeople would tend to say it is not the disciplines per se that are beneficial, but the underlying spirituality that the lifestyle is assumed to support. Clever answers as this does not fully address the apparent fallacy of the BKs prescribing the same remedy for everyone. Most secular counselors and therapists know that there is not one right thing for everyone. Not one message to always give.

Shifting the subject slightly, I remember as teacher, giving my blessings to a few who loved Baba and the center, yet would clearly never become vegetarian. Other BK teachers might be judgmental. All BK teachers seem to judge people on the basis of such distinctions. Di writes that she feels it. It hurts to be judged based on artificial criteria. You feel the person doesn't care anything about who you are as a person.

I think it will be interesting to write about how it was to be a BK teacher. Did we brainwash others? Did we judge them? How did we get satisfaction through explaining our version of the truth?

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Re: What's pulling me away?

Post by abrahma kumar » 08 Apr 2007

joel wrote:I think it will be interesting to write about how it was to be a BK teacher. Did we brainwash others? Did we judge them? How did we get satisfaction through explaining our version of the truth?
... A question of immense importance that never arises in the BKWSU. I have never heard Dadi Janki asked this question in any in-house interview. Sometime ago I shared a recent experience in which for the very first time a 'student' questioned why? they should take on-board (much less believe) the information I was sharing and the conclusions that they felt they were being guided toward. In that post I spoke of my utter shock at the question. It was as if a spell had been broken.

My subtle consciousness at the time was that OMG the student is actually signalling to me that there is no way he is going to concede his 'mind' to this BK oblox without:
  • (1) Exercising his right chose whether or not this was in his own self-interest (in the broadest sense of the word) to do so. and;
    (2) Obtaining from me an unambiguous statement about the intent behind these teachings.
Joel, you could have struck me down with a feather because it had never happened before - and mark you this WAS NOT the meditation course! In my mind I praised the soul for having the strength and insight to voice this critical concern. And I asked myself the same question that you do here. How many times had my own consciousness been such that I completely over-rode a fellow human-beings natural caution at being presented with these BKWSU ideas. For over-rode read brainwash.

Anyway, I do not want to rehash that post but I too wonder whether there is some subtle form of coercion that takes place. It may be due to the strength of our own convictions and faith as an instrument of Shiv Baba. It may be the Shiva soul itself that does that work of 'washing', who knows.

Oh and BTW it was after my involvement on this forum that the event to which I refer happened. I will be eternally grateful to this place for that bit of insight. It means that I have finally understood (in my own mind of course :D :D ) what it means 'to feel the pulse'.

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What's pulling me away ..?

Post by abrahma kumar » 09 Apr 2007

Another thing that is pulling me away is the sanskar of 'correction' which takes an extreme form in some of our BK sanskaras. One of the most detestable character traits imaginable. Wah! To be exposed to this sanskar on a fairly consistent basis is a fate that I would not wish on any soul whether it be as 'perpretrator' or 'victim'.

What's worse is that for all the Murli presents us with Shrimat and represents the Supreme Ultimate Truth I never ever felt Baba to have that over bearing need to 'correct' every single perceived flaw that i have. So while I find it effortlessly easy to love Baba, even when he is correcting, it as an almighty challenge to feel the same open-heartedness towards soils who take upon themselves the mantle of 'rod of correction'.

Yes yes yes I know that this post reveals my own weakness - but did i ever say that i was perfect?!

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Re: What's pulling me away ..?

Post by joel » 09 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:Yes yes yes I know that this post reveals my own weakness - but did I ever say that I was perfect?!
Thanks for your angle on the BK practice of 'correcting'.

As far as weakness goes, the cost to me of avoiding revealing my weakness is the unpleasant situation of finding myself mute. Trusting oneself enough to risk exposing weakness/vulnerability is an important life theme for me these past years.

I appreciate your communicating openly about your process.

--Joel

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Post by abrahma kumar » 09 Apr 2007

ooooooppps!

Apologies to anyone who finds reason to take offence at my earlier typo through which souls became referred to as soils. This misnomer was due to an entirely accidental typing error. And as the disclaimer goes: Any resemblance to a known character, either living or deceased, is purely accidental; and the events portrayed in the telling of this tale are purely fictional. :roll:

Om Shanti.

P.S please refer to this post in the event that any of my previous - and future - typing mistakes give rise to personal offence.

Om Shanti

P.S. Has anyone ever subjected an Avyakt Murli to a spell check in Microsoft Word and noticed some of the quite hilarious recommended corrections? No points for guessing that that they would render the Murli totally meaningless.

Take care and enjoy the forum.

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Post by paulkershaw » 11 Apr 2007

Abrahma Kumar wrote:Yes yes yes I know that this post reveals my own weakness - but did I ever say that I was perfect?!
Hey there. you're perfect in your own way, because you're showing your human-ness. Being a Human is just as important as a Human just Being ... showing supposed 'weakness' only shows that you're still on the path of self-mastery and have realised it, so well done.

There ya go - now you have to deal with some praise too!
Be well. XX

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Post by abrahma kumar » 16 Apr 2007

yudhishtira wrote:I will just say that I feel a slight pressure (self imposed obviously!) that I have to be the representative voice of the BKs when I post on here as a BK, when in reality, I can only share my own experience.

I would encourage the BKs who I know are open minded and open hearted and that I know are looking at this site that we need you here; not to get into Gyan fights but just to be yourselves. Thats all we can be. Everyone has a right to their opinion and their faith. And it doesn't matter whether you feel you cannot join the more intellectual debates or not.

You are Gods child. Posting here will not remove that fact! . Also, we need to respect the fact that people have been through their own experiences and they are all valid. So when posting on here, we need to be real, talk about our own experiences and not hide behind Gyan and others quotes.

I intend to spend more time on here soon responding to some of the stuff thats come up whilst I was away and share my experiences of Madhuban

Hi Yude (hope you don't mind the truncation of your nick. I can assure you that i address you so owing more to feelings of kinship rather than laziness or disrespect for your cyber handle!) my own fingers have been itching to feedback on that BK only thread. I have just about restraint myself by way of drawing upon reserves of a Herculean amount of restraint that I did know I possessed.

You, my friend, have no such need to resist because it is a BK thread. But looking at your post, I can understand 100% the opening remarks. It is a weird feeling to find oneself in such a minority that a disclaimer feels appropriate. Been there many a-time myself and, as you rightly say, all we are doing is sharing our own individual experience. Are we BKs so afraid to do that? Or is it my own ego to hope that God's children can feel to share their experiences here? The "conspicuous absence of BK posters" on this site speaks volumes for those, like you, who not only seem to get the essence of the spiritual journey but also find themselves unafraid to share that. Good luck and let's see how the thread goes.

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not much to say right now

Post by abrahma kumar » 19 Apr 2007

As is my wont every now and then i take a jaunt over here in my little corner of the forum and talk with myself like a lunatic.

I remember a post in which some BK opined that this forum seemed to be a place where people who failed to take responsibility for their own well-being gathered for a mutual whinge - what a typically BK-inspired lordly view that is (imho).

Personally having read a few of the newer revelations about the BKWSU fact twisting exploits (over many many decades) I must say that I feel abused; and i guess so would any other person except perhaps to a rabidly pro-BKWSU individual. My advice to them is to take your blinkers off people! Have a good look around in the fair light of day and then decide of you want to stay. If that if Shiva soul is God and those SS only act under His divine guidance then I am amazed at the stuff that God sanctions. Is the answer that we have to disconnect the BKWSU corporate goings-on from Shiv Baba and lead our spiritual lives accordingly?

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Post by abrahma kumar » 26 Apr 2007

A subset of a bro nero post explored whether:
Neo wrote:When we pray to God or have Yoga or what ever we are connecting to a part of ourselves or part of the world's collective consciousness or unconsciousness, usually via a personal or tribal archetype, and it’s our emotions that attract transformations.
Absolutely incre-di-ble! Wonderful feedback. On this collective consciousness/unconsciousness tip, i from time to time have strange experiences (not restricted to meditation only) in which there is the distinct impression that certain trains of thought are not 'deliberately instigated' by the self; but rather I seem to get awakened to their existence as a sort of 'wonderment'. Something that the intellect gets alerted to in the midst of exploration but the moment/process by which these thoughts bacame a focal point of attention is not specific nor important. I look upon the process as a sort of captivation (am i mad?!)

When I reflect on those experiences I wonder whether the soul sometimes gets as a 'boon' periods in which it is able to 'tap into some sort of positive collective consciousness' that surrounds us on earth. As if the soul pulls or gets sent these thoughts or realisations or whatever you call them, down into the corporeal realm so making then present as 'reality' on earth. But the whole thing is so subtle that if not alert we can either miss or gloss over as mere coincidence. I can recall some very moving instances of this phenomena after which incidents on planet earth clearly reflected these thought sequences.

When bro neo says:
True security comes from putting faith in this process.
I could not agree more and would ask further whether it is at all necessary to understand how the process works? Or do we need just to have faith so that we gradually learn how to set ourselves in being alive to its manifestation? Will understanding eventually come out of this acceptance?

Imagine if God's and the soul's pure positive 'thoughts' are a form of energy surrounding the earth (some sort of jet stream) available to our consciousness/sub-conscious when we too 'vibrate' on that jet-stream frequency. Perhaps when we say in common language that our "stage is good" or whatever way we want to term it. The sub-conscious level being one in which the magnitude of impact is so subtle that we seem unable to catch it. Bt it happens nonetheless.

When i came into Gyan the BKWSU centres around the world were all reading different Murlis on any given day so the power of 'collective consciousness/churning' was obviously 'dimmer' than it is now that the system of reading the same Murli in the centres all over the world has been instituted. Imagine the power of thousands of souls churning on the same Godly ideas on a much more consistent basis? It must have marked a quantum shift in the BKWSU's collective consciousness energy field.

Like on this site for instance. Since i 'joined-in' in January i observe a definite trend for 'able-minded souls' to gravitate towards this place. Making quality contributions. Souls who have become fearless and done with hiding. It is very uplifting and only baba knows the extent of service that this place is getting done.

I am sure that some of the longer standing posters may also be feeling a growing sense of comaraderie and purposefulness at the way the site is developing. And all of this while many of us are totally unknown to each other in the physical sense of recognition. Sometimes I wonder (lightly) as to the balance between pre and post 1969 birthdated posters on this site i.e. what percentage took physical birth when Brahma Baba was in Sakar form and how many are his Avyakt creation. And does this balance tell us anything important about the current state of the BKWSU or this site for that matter.

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Post by yudhishtira » 27 Apr 2007

Hi Yude (hope you don't mind the truncation of your nick. I can assure you that I address you so owing more to feelings of kinship rather than laziness or disrespect for your cyber handle!) my own fingers have been itching to feedback on that BK only thread. I have just about restraint myself by way of drawing upon reserves of a Herculean amount of restraint that I did know I possessed.
Hey pal, thanks for the heads up and i do not mind you shortening my name at all! I know that I am in a fortunate position because i have kept my faith and relationship with Baba outside the stranglehold of instrument parmat which has unfortunately hurt so many souls. It hasn't been easy. The amount of self doubt has been huge but totally thanks to friends, and Him Upstairs, I am still here.

I realised the importance of my difficult journey when seeing the response of the 2 lovely ladies who I had the privilege of talking to about Karma last night to. I realised I had actually come to an understanding of this without pain or pressure and so they were able to understand it easily and see how they could be the creators of their own lives. This is why i feel its important to carry on. Some of us so need to have the courage to apply Gyan in reality in a loving and compassionate way so we can show the hierarchy that there is another way.

Unfortunatly, most BKs think that without the structure, they cannot have their Baba and love Him too, and so they are afraid to post here that they will lose their stage. I say, if you cant cope with looking at an opposite view point, what is your faith based on?

So thanks Baba, and thank you ABK for your courage in examining your motives. It is possible to seperate Seniors Parmat from Baba's Shrimat. Shiv Baba hasnt vanished because his instruments are in a pickle and have screwed things up. However, if anyone EXPECTS human beings to be like god, they are gonna have a problem. My distilled conclusion from several years on a roller coaster. :wink:

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