I get in or pull him out

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jannisder
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I get in or pull him out

Post by jannisder » 29 Jan 2007

Also my first post. Familiar story

Met a nice guy. Happens to be a Raja Yoga teacher. I feel like I am betraying him at this moment but after reading this forum, I have my doubts.

Because of him I started the 7 day course. We spent a lot of time together and some even think we are a couple. Honestly, I am in love with him but don't show it to him (I try) so I wont scare him of. He lives a celibate life.

I am willing to do the same just to be with him ... but is he nice to me to serve Baba and sees me as a lost soul waiting to be saved or dash he really likes me. He said that I am a special soul ... I am special to many people and being special is not new to me. I am a peaceful person with inner peace and no worries, certainly not desperate for a partner.

Should I tell him about this forum, and try to get him out? Or do I have to get in first?

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Post by bansy » 29 Jan 2007

Welcome to the forum jannisder.

Your situation is quite common, and worrying that it happens all to often.

As a general tip, for you and for anyone, unless you are already in a relationship beforehand, then do not enter into a relationship with someone who is going through a spiritual path. Someone is going to get hurt. For example, would you join the Vatican if your friend is a clergyman. Or would you join the Church because your friend is a nun. From a spiritual viewpoint, everyone is a special soul, it is not something special to say. In BK world, one is conditioned to say such things.

It does not mean not to show friendship, but not to get into relationships. People in the BK path cannot have relationships because it means the other person draws away their energy whereas their energy should be drawn towards God. You therefore become the "devil" or "Maya" as it is called in the BK world.

As a friend, you could tell him about this forum, but let him decide what to do, otherwise you could blame yourself one day for getting him out or vice-versa he could blame you. For yourself, only get into the BKs if your purpose is to meet God and looking for peace. So after the 7 day course, does it interest you or what was your purpose for doing the course ?

If you are honest and you love him, you would tell him, not hide it.

Good luck.

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Post by jannisder » 29 Jan 2007

Thanks for you're reply.

Ever since i met this person, i have been going throw some transformation. Me, i always had a more spiritual life and don't see anything wrong with that. I feel he is like my twinflame/soulmate. But i think that BKs do not belief in that. We make fantastic plans for the future even with living on the same grounds together, like living apart together, on conditions that i live not necessary as a Brahmin, but have a pure life. That is OK as far as i am concerned.

We are both good philosophers and talk about all life questions BK and have great humor! I respect his celibate life and although i like him more than a lot, i would never ever make any sexual minded moves towards him. I would support him more in his path to whatever he wants, (the Golden Age to be a king!)

It is a good feeling to listen to him during the course, what it will do to me is yet on known ... For now its hard to not see him anymore all of a sudden and i am to chicken to tell him about my feelings, afraid to lose him. And God was and is always in my life anyway, to call it Baba seems a bit strange ...

As English is not my first language, i apologise for any writing mistakes as a seen in "sins", that has to be "since". Sorry about that. For more information, we are not youngsters. He in his fifties i in my forties.

I must say that i am happy to have found this forum.

warm regards

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abrahma kumar
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Post by abrahma kumar » 29 Jan 2007

Om Shanti jannisder and welcome to the forum and thak you for the openness of your sharing. The forum is a place that you can come to any time you need to express your thoughts.

Regards
AbeK

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Post by jannisder » 29 Jan 2007

Om Shanti

My honest thoughts and please yours!! To help me out!

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Post by bansy » 30 Jan 2007

Can you identify your deepest fear;
  • Losing him ?
    Getting into the BKs ?
    Afraid of him ? Afraid of God ?
As one gets older, the security aspects, such as financial, relationships, tend to be deeper, and decisions more critical as you could also be thinking of your health. Transformation is quite normal as compared to someone who is in their teens to someone who is in the 50s, and this is even with people without a spiritual life, just part of "growing up" and mellowing with experience of life. Some people find some sort of "new life" when they get older, when they realise their potential to learn or find things.

If he is in his 50s, what is his aim now in life. Do you have the same aim ? Not a supportive one, but one that holds a path for you. Then maybe you can grow together.

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Post by mitra » 30 Jan 2007

Dear jannisder :)

Om Shanti,

Being a BK, I would say that the ultimate aim of a soul who wants to remain as a BK is to have all relationship with GOD, i.e. in BK language - SHIV BABA. Then there is no question of any relationship with a human soul. Because human souls get attracted to other human souls, basically on the basis of some divine virtues. One will feel attracted to another by seeing others good behaviour, or good character, or good manners whatever may be. But who gave that good character, manner etc? It is taken from the Ultimate Supreme Source - The only one - The Father of all Souls - Lord Shiva. This is the basic lesson given to any soul who knowingly or unknowingly have a part to play similar to your case.

In your case I believe that you have attended the 7 day course and COMPLETELY understood this new knowledge?. Then you can take your own decision by considering the various replies. Ultimately it it YOUR OWN LIFE.

Do Raja Yoga meditaion and you will get your reply.

IBHS
MITRA 8)

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Post by abrahma kumar » 30 Jan 2007

Dear Mitra,

Thank you for your feedback.

You shared your viewpoint from the BKWSU perspective i.e:
Being a BK, I would say that the ultimate aim of a soul who wants to remain as a BK is to have all relationship with GOD.
Could it be interpreted from that statement that BK's regard themselves as beings souls somewhat different to other souls, in that they (BK souls) one day arrive at the realisation that their aim is to have all relationship with GOD? Mitra, is it possible for any soul to realise this ultimate aim you refer to without ANY exposure to the teachings of BKWSU?

You also kindly offered that with right understanding
there is no question of any relationship with a human soul. Because human souls get attracted to other human souls basically on the basis of some divine virtues. One will feel attracted to another by seeing others good behaviour, or good character or good manners whatever may be.
Mitra, If that ultimate Supreme Source - The only one - The Father of all Souls - Lord Shiva Shiva gave everything why does Shiva now appear to want to have everything back? Do BK's somehow get indebted to Shiva from the moment they realise that everything they have is given to them by Shiva?

Mitra, it is beyond doubt that all soul's will benefit from an environment in which "good behaviour, or good character or good manners whatever may be" prevails. Does that Shiva soul 'benefit' in any way from other soul's realising that they want to have all relationship with that Shiva soul? And if not, why not?

Om Shanti

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Post by jannisder » 30 Jan 2007

Good discussion. Thanks, keep it going.

So if he only wants a relationship with God, what is he doing spending so much time with me!

How do i have to call this ... " hanging out"?

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Post by proy » 30 Jan 2007

jannisder wrote:I feel he is like my twinflame/soulmate. But I think that BKs do not believe in that.
No, they definitely do not believe in that. You will find that if you go in any deeper even your friendship with him will be discouraged. The 7 days course is just a hook to get you in. Don't go in. I went in as a 50 year old married man and put my relationship with my wife at grave risk because of that decision. The further in you get the more you find out. They don't tell you very much at all at the beginning. Your feelings for him will be seen as a "vice".

Read and believe what Bansy is saying to you, it is very good advice. If you go in to get closer to him you will be making a big mistake, they will tear you apart, with great skill and subtlety. That said, examine your own reasons and motives. It seems to me you really love him, yes? Is he happy being a BK?

If you pull him out and he has a problem he may blame you. I feel for your situation. It is one that happens very often, these spiritual men are very nice and attractive, but it is unlikely that there will be a good outcome unless you are both very skilled with relationships and also very lucky. Sorry to sound pessimistic, but it is best for you to know the truth sooner rather than later. Think about what you are getting yourself into please.

By the way, welcome to the forum, and good luck.

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Post by abrahma kumar » 30 Jan 2007

To borrow a phrase sung by the aka Tom Jones sang: It's not unusual to be loved by anyone. It is so very interesting the support role that this forum is serving. I wonder if GOD's BKWSU has in it's service plans the creation of a place/atmosphere within it's structure in which practical stiuations such as this can be discussed without recourse to dogma or stigmatisation.

Bansy's questions in response were practical ones. Question's that invite a soul to examine itself; it's motives and the scenes that it is experiencing in the drama with maturity. Thank you for coming to share jannisder.

Om Shanti

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Post by jannisder » 30 Jan 2007

Only with tears in my eyes i can read all the reply. How can BK God Shiva forbid love while he seems to be love ... and tell me that i am the devil / Maya to my friend because i love him with all my heart?

What will Shiva's punishment be to me for loving? Not that i am afraid of that ... i will survive because my God shall be there never punishing me for anything!

Thank you for helping me out!!

Warm regards

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Post by abrahma kumar » 31 Jan 2007

Jannisder. Thank you for your posts. Although this situation will be testing and painful it will be beneficial for you to hold on to the feelings that you have about your survival being assured "because your God shall be there never punishing me for anything!" (your words).

It may also help that you aleady have an experience/belief's in 'your God' so that even if you will get introduced to new ideas about God by your BK friend there will be some independent energy that you have available to you.

On the forum there are posters with varying degrees of experience of life and of the with the BK's. Take care.

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Post by jannisder » 31 Jan 2007

Pain because i do not have the right knowledge (yet). I have been studying for the last few months, almost 24 hours a day about, BK.

Although i have my doubts here and there, i have desisted from going in. I need to know and see for myself. Don't worry i can handle it! I shall keep you posted.

His way out is for me to get in! Or what ever happens ... only time can tell.

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Post by abrahma kumar » 31 Jan 2007

Strange how one knows that there would be a response.
Jannisder wrote:His way out is for me to get in! Or what ever happens ... only time can tell.
What does it mean?

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