ex-l wrote:I was always left wondering if I/we were only in "soul conceptness" rather than "soul consciousness" and felt surrounded by the majority of folks just treading water 'following a religion' and a few investing in the intellectualisation and commercialisation of it. Was there anyone actually "in" soul-consciousness at an experiential level or was it all an analogue of soul-consciousness being forced from the outside by social pressures to conform to a Brahmin way, e.g. external behaviour being proscribed by what was decreed as soul-consciousness or "royal" right the way down to dress, hairstyles, methodology of protest etc.
Then there exists the problem of how folks supposed in such a high state of soul-consciousness after 70 years could do such dumb or dishonest things ...
I guess that the actual experience of soul consciousness will vary with each individual.
At the very beginning of my venture into the BK world, all I had was the concept of "I am a soul, a point of light in the middle of the forehead" and as I was trying to concentrate on this in my meditation exercises, I actually experienced it to some extent. Not the light part of it but the point form, the location, the being distinct from the body, the original nature of ultimate serenity, the sense of eternity or to say it better of timelessness... and, to top it all, the most wonderful experience of God's motherly love.
Through all of my 24 years as a BK, using the concept of soul consciousness in my meditations has always brought some experience but it is not enough, I think. I like to use it in my daily life and interactions. The meditation experiences have induced a change in the way I look at others, in the way I feel about others. It has become easier for me to see the beauty and the good in others and whenever I fell annoyed or upset with someone, if I remind myself of the concept of the soul, it helps me a lot to feel better about that one. What use would there be of practicing soul consciousness if I did not get that kind of results from it?
As for the "royal" ways of dressing, hairstyles and methodology of protest, I think that there is a lot of heavy body consciousness that get mixed into it, don't you?
I generally never had the Seniors on too high of a pedestal but what I learned here since I join the Forum has pretty much ended any trust that I still had in them. I was in Madhuban for the end of the season and I had the opportunity to take toli from some of them. It was interesting for me to see that I still had natural feelings of love for them. There was also a feeling of mercy for them, that they are trapped in their role, trapped in a cage that they build around themselves.
Having now been exposed to some shocking truth about the BK organization, even my faith in Shiv Baba being God has been shaken to some extent and I will probably need to hear him say
ex-l wrote:well, actually folks, you got it all wrong ...
before I can get it back to where it used to be.